Choosing to hide your heart

It’s hard when you go through life having to hide your emotions, stuff them into your heart so nobody would see them, raise your voice to drown out the voice inside your head. Maybe it’s because you were raised that way, raised to show the world that everything is okay, because any crack in the facade would make others think you’re weak. Or maybe it’s because you are too scared to acknowledge what you feel because you can’t deal with the repercussions. Or maybe it’s because you realize that nobody can really help you with what you’re going through so why give others ammunition to use against you now (by making fun) or in the future (by blackmailing you)?

And so you keep on stuffing your heart until it’s full. And hope that one day everything you’re feeling will disappear and you’ll get  the chance to start afresh. But do you? Can you? Really. Nothing really goes away. And you are faced with the repercussions anyway; of suppressing everything.

It’s hard when you go through life choosing to barricade your heart and hide your emotions. Because in the end of the day, it’s a choice you’re making. Sometimes other people factor into that choice because you don’t want to hurt their feelings. And you know it’s really safer that way. For everyone involved.

Except you maybe.

But does that matter?