Month: January 2011
So today’s post is a really simple assignment, where you are invited to share my posts with friends who preferably have no clue about this blog. The reason is simply because I have to hit a certain statistics target for January, and there are only a couple of days left.
So, if you know someone who’s trying to battle boredom in the office, you can share “When Time Doesn’t Pass”. Or if you know someone who just graduated, you can share Reflections on Graduation Day. You can make people appreciate what they have by sharing Blessings We Take For Granted Part 1. Alternatively, you can classify your school mates by checking out Students Classified. Or you can classify your work colleagues by going through Work Colleagues Classified. For a good laugh, you can check out; Overheard at AUS. Or you can open Draw a Heart for a nerdy way of drawing a heart using matlab.
If someone has wronged you and you need inspiration to forgive them, you can check When Will We Learn To Forgive, and If Tomorrow Never Comes(Si Mañana Nunca Llega). Or if you know someone who’s getting married soon you can share “But It’s just One Day”.
You can share by clicking on the Share button below each post that gives you the option of sharing through email, twitter, facebook, linked in, google buzz.
Or you can just share this post.
Quote of The Day;
A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. “Never leave that till tomorrow,” he said, “Which you can do today.” This is the man who discovered electricity. You’d think more of us would listen to what he had to say. I don’t know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I’d say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure. Fear of pain. Fear of rejection. Sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you’re wrong? What if you make a mistake you can’t undo? Whatever it is we’re afraid of, one thing holds true: that by the time the pain of not doing the thing gets worse than the fear of doing it, it can feel like we’re carrying around a giant tumor. And you thought I was speaking metaphorically
Today is the Commencement Ceremony for Fall 2010 class, and students are about to step over the threshold into the unknown. Graduation is the point in life where students move from the steady state to the unsteady state; where they discover that not everything they had to learn in university is pretty useful; where they discover that life out there is so not as-seen-on-TV.
Up until graduation, life is pretty much simplified. Whenever you have a d/dt in the equation, you can easily equate it to zero, put your shades on *cool* and drink lemon mint. But then in the real world, a lot of problems revolve around defining d/dt and not equating it to zero. For instance, you thought it was bad that you had three deadlines on the same day. But at the end of the day, your work was translated into a letter grade on a piece of paper. However, come the real world, and any mistake you make can cost money – and/or lives – so your level of alertness and concentration might need to shoot through the roof. For instance, when you’re a student, you worry about coursework and studying, hanging out with friends, etc….Graduate, get a job and get married, and suddenly the number of things you have to worry about catapult to a level that makes you wish you can worry about exams again.
So it’s not all dreary in your post-graduation life. After all, you probably don’t even know what you want after graduation, so you’re open to different ideas and plans. I remember a friend who came to me once before my graduation and asked, “So what are your plans?”
I told her, “Well, the usual, get a job, go to grad school or get married.”
She gave me this lecture about how we engineers need to think outside the box, and consider other options. Why are we so limited by these three options only? Go out there and explore…
Blah blah blah
So after so much thinking outside the box, I think it’s apparent what I did.
I got a job
And now I’m in grad school
In other words, I just stuck to the conventional path. Come her graduation and I asked her, “So what are you planning to do after graduation?”
She said something along the lines, “How much did you like it when people asked you that?”
The truth is, despite our God-knows-how-long in the system, a lot of us still don’t have our lives figured out. Maybe we are just going with whatever comes first. Maybe it’s to the better. We never know. Let’s just see what happens. And that’s when it dawns to us that whatever we studied in school….needs to just stay in school…among the library shelves and between the class walls.
Congrats on your graduation, Fall 2010 class. And remember, this is just the beginning.
So if you know someone graduatin today, feel free to share
I’m sure some people might be bored of the topic already because we’ve discussed it in The Four Wives Solution, On Weddings and On Weddings Part 2. But today’s angle is a little bit different. It’s a little bit more sober. It started with a discussion over the Hijab. There are some who argue that they don’t want to wear the Hijab because they’re waiting to get married, because they don’t want to take it off during their mixed weddings. So just don’t wear it until then, instead of wearing it and taking it off one day then putting it back on.
Now seriously, people… The argument makes it seem as though one option is better than the other, when they’re both wrong. The obvious question one must ask themselves is, can you really guarantee your life until you get married?
Then there’s the whole idea of starting off the marriage on the wrong foot, for example those who take off their Hijab for that one day, or those who find a nice can’t-breathe-in-this-thing strapless white dress, paint white on the rest of their bodies and tada! upgraded version of the wedding dress to take into account that they are Hijabi’s in a mixed wedding. And don’t forget the topic of plucking one’s eyebrows, which is something that a lot of people in our MTV era are taking for granted, even though it is a major sin connected to la3na – or 6ard min ra7mat Allah. The argument is that some say they are doing it to beautify themselves in front of their husbands who they must obey. But is there obedience of people when it comes to disobedience of Allah?
As an analogy, when someone’s boss gives him a promotion, the employee focuses on bettering their connection with the boss, and his requirements to ensure that what they’re doing matches the new job description. By getting married, there’s a lot of things added to the married couple’s new plates – a new set of responsibilities- but how are they trying to better their connection with Allah (SWT)? The thing is, marriage is an important transition, it’s a shaky ground that can solidify or collapse with time. It’s an important time when we really yearn for baraka, yet some people may involve themselves in disobeying Allah (SWT)?!
Then there are those who take off the Hijab in front of the husband’s male members. Ya3ni, maybe the wedding is originally segregated but the guy walks in with his brothers and cousins, and the bride is looking pretty in her wedding dress which only the husband should see shar3an, but c’mon, dude we’re one big family now.
Then the people who argue, “But c’mon, we don’t usually wear such tight clothes, we don’t usually take off the Hijab, we don’t usually… This is just for one day.”
But death can happen in one moment, and we never know when.
Allah yihdeena jamee3an & yi7sin 5atematana
So sometimes at times of confusion and uncertainty, we do hit rock bottom. Forget getting stuck in the sand like that Land Cruiser as mentioned here, forget being anchored as mentioned here, forget fantasizing about burning bridges as mentioned here. Sometimes what happens is we just hit rock bottom.
No matter how hard we try to keep a straight face, to smile in the face of adversity, and to distract our minds from the state of pandemonium that’s within us, sometimes it reaches to a point where we can’t live in denial anymore, and we are left with desperation as intense as fire, and maybe we try to sleep it off in hopes that it will end up feeding on itself and eventually burn out. And it’s not like we feel as though we are running on empty anymore as much as we know that we are not running at all.
And yet the days are running; with or without us. It’s like the days are melting into nights, and nights are dispersing within the days, while we’re waiting for something to disperse whatever it is that’s eating us up from inside.
Yet, at times like this, we just need a break, a break from our daily routine, a break from the world and its glamor, a break where we sit in solitude, and reflect on the hard questions about our lives, our religion, our deeds. Because it may be our spirits that are hungry, hungry for a renewal of faith, a recharge of repentance, and a revival of tawwakul (dependance on Allah).
And the transformation may be slow, progress may be slow, but the moment we put the right intention in our hearts, and take the first step, our worries disperse, and we start believing that whatever the next step might be, it’s going to be for the best in sha’Allah. It might not be what we had put in mind all along; it might not appear as a “happy” moment at first; but whatever it is, it’s all a test…
اللَّهُمَّ اجْعَلْ لَنا مِنْ كُلِّ ضِيقٍ مَخْرَجاً، وَمِنْ كُلِّ هَمٍّ فَرَجاً، وَمِنْ كُلِّ بَلاَءٍ عَافِيَةً. اللَّهُمَّ آمِنْ رَوْعاتِنا، وَاسْتُرْ عَوْرَاتِنا، وَأَصْلِحْ نِيّاتِنا، وَذُرِّيّاتِنا، وَأَحْسِنْ خَواتِمَنا