When you care too much, you get hurt a lot, so in order to stop hurting you need to care too much. Of course, a lot of people might claim there is a logical fallacy there but let me explain.
When you care too much, there is a higher chance of hurting too much, right? And everytime you get hurt, it’s like a dagger sent through your heart, and even if you don’t let others see it, the immense pain is there. You feel it. With time the wound might heal (or it might scar over) and you move on. You care again, and you get hurt again, and the cycle continues; the more you care, the more you get hurt. But then a point comes when your heart is so scarred over that you don’t feel the pain anymore. Your threshold for pain increases, and suddenly the pain doesn’t feel so bad.
Think about it in another way. Burnt skin hurts for some time but when the sensory cells die do you feel anything?
So in other words, When you care too much, you get hurt a lot, so in order to stop hurting you need to care too much.
Do you agree or not?
Image courtesy of google images; 
you’ve got me smiling over this…
i partially agree…hurting is human…. the more expectations u have the bigger your dissappointment shall be… i’d rather work on expecting less that caring too much…
I second you on that. Thanks for commenting
Amina i like the idea… but when u r hit with a “knockout: الضربة القاضية” punch, it is difficult to overcome the pain, especially if its emotional hurting not physical or physiological
@alikhandro, all I need to say is that with time, even the worse pains heal.
I feel this is not true, the pain stays , but you learn to live with it. My son died in May2012, he was only 21 years and everybody tells me that time heasl the wounds, its not true, or at least not to me…….you learn to live with the pain, but it will never go away…….this is my opinion……., feel free to read my blog and give me your opinions and experiences on this, it will be highly appreciated, I am never to old to learn from them…… Lots of love
Thanks for your comment and really sorry about your son. When I was writing about this I was mostly talking about heartache and rejection, not loss of a loved one because of death. Thanks 4 your response I really appreciate it.
I enjoyed reading it, thanx!! It’s a common thread we all have and it’s true that every human wants to feel @tlst appreciated 4 being too caring…It’s kind of a defence mechanism to protect oneself from getting hurt. However, like you’ve put it, cont… to care too much and eventually healing take place and we can move on in life. I maself, used to take it personally and feel hurt, but not any more….( doesn’t mean i’ve stopped, i still do it_” carin too much” coz it’s worth it!!). Trust me, there’s a huge amount of freedom that comes to u when u take nothing personally, u become immune!
@mariam I agree with u, but it’s not easy not to take things personally, especially when ppl hurt us so bad.
it’s what we do with that pain is what can lift us up or not…some of us do and can mould the pain into something positive (or not).
Not forgetting, it’s a progress with time u’ll adopt!!
Yes you reach to a point where you no longer feel that hurt, but thats worse because for me personally, once i reach that stage for anyone there’s no turning back
@shireen, I guess that depends on how strong ur positive emotion was (love or caring), the more you love, the more permanent it feels when you’re hurt and it’s over.
love the pic!
you actually put it in a very nice way, but I still have to disagree. I don’t think the immunity system of hearts works that way. I would say there are two ways not to hurt:
(A) Care less. You will still get hurt sometimes, but you won’t bother.
(B) Care too much, yes you will get hurt too much, but then your immunity system will evolve and you will care less next time. go to (A)
@hanan, I love the way you put it…so computer engineering style. step 1, step 2 and then form a loop like a program. Thanks for the comment
Once I saw an interesting clip about the correlation between the size of the heart and degree of hurt… the bigger your heart is, the smaller the problems/pain/hurt will be compared to it… so picture this:
you have two knives of the same size (keeping the size of the problem constant)
and two hearts for two different people…
one is extremely large (stronger iman, etc)
the other one is tiny
and each knife is stuck into a heart…
of course the one with the smaller heart will hurt much much much more… whereas that exact same problem will seem so small compared to the size of the heart…
I agree to a great extent with the way you put it, but the way I see it is that you don’t become numb and hurt less or get used to that kind of pain and increase your tolerance… it’s just that the problem itself seems so much smaller when you grow from the inside and not when your “sensory cells” die…….
I think it’s what you mean, right? I don’t know why I sensed a little negative connotation with the way you described it ….
@ muna, I gues your comment wins on this post because I like the way you explained it. Keep commenting. As for the negative connotation, it depends on how you see it.I just want to people to understand that hurting doesn’t always mean something bad because they learn to be stronger the next time.
See, with analogies, one has to be careful.. Analogies are tools to strengthen our understanding by drawing a mental image to closer-to-the-mind everyday actions.. Once you drew the analogy, it doesn’t mean that it represents the phenomena entirely. The bigger problem arises when the analogy is taken to a bigger extent than the original situation trying to stretch both to fit each other. That might look appealing for a second, or even thought provoking, but never be fooled by that my advice..
Be careful with analogies, especially with “emotional” imagery..
Sometimes I am afraid to care about someone knowing that in the future this person will hurt me. You are right – the person you care for the most will also be the same person who will hurt you the greatest.
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You should read the story of the perfect heart. It’s exacty what you’re talking about here!
Where might I find this story of a perfect heart? Thanks!
you’ve got me thinking over this now…